Research has shown that there are so many reasons but the important ones would be highlighted for guidance, for us to stop this canker worms that is eating deep into our singleness.
1. PACKAGING: It is no longer news that good packaging makes good sales.
Have you ever heard a buyer confess that the reason for buying a product is because of the packaging? Most ladies are finding it very hard to settle down because they refuse to package themselves for the rightful potential buyer.
So many ladies are not aware of what their dress culture does to them. A good number of ladies in the quest for fun and pleasure forget that the hand of time no matter how slow is actually moving and can’t be turned back if you doubt me as R. Kelly.
“Most ladies are finding it very hard to settle down because they refuse to package themselves for the rightful potential buyer”
As much as we should live our age we should also live a life of anticipation. This is the kind of life that calls ladies to live as those ready for the marital life even in their fun filled youthful days. Why you must dress to fit, you must not forget to dress appropriately, this unknown to so many is the key of attraction, is the way you dress, attracts either the right or the wrong person.
A discussion with some men opened up how men view ladies that are not moderately dressed, their joint conclusion is, they can date anybody but when they are ready to settle down they are very investigative. Come off it ladies, No man wants to marry the irresponsible type, so then how about doing something with your wardrobe. Let’s stop wasting time, No matter how good you are in character and otherwise, there is one way to let that guy know the stuff you are made of, and that is by attracting him with your appearance. Remember the way you are dressed determines who and how you are addressed.
As earlier mentioned, good packaging makes good sales but loyalty i.e. continuity can only be ensured if the product is ok and that is, a product of its make-up. In the same way your dressing might attract the right person but there are other "make-up" that determines whether he will wait or not.
When we're saying packaging we're talking about your dress attitude.
Let’s look at it this way, the latest way of making a product appeal is its packaging, the only way to ensure that a product enjoys patronage again and again is based on its components. What are the components?
2. ATTITUDE: Your attitude is your constant character which is based on your disposition. Your attitude did not just grow, it was developed psychologically over time, it could be positive or negative, nobody has 100% of positive attitude there is negative attitude in every being but the truth is no matter the percentage of negativism in you, if it is not rightly and maturely controlled, it covers the good side of you. Imagine a lady who picks her nose always, take it or leave it, no matter how small it is, when she is seen, her beauty might attracts, her dressing appealing, but what will repel them is that singular picking of the nose because this will account for dirtiness.
Aside being dirty, your carriage, your social attitude, the way you relate i.e. whether you're the noisy or quiet one also matters, your moralities. Listen to me ladies, when a man who actually wants to settle down with you comes, he will not only check your attitude with him alone, he looks at your entire environment, how you relate with people, he is concerned with what people says about you, etc.
Your attitude determines the altitude at which that guy will take you; it could be very low or very high. What ever, enough of it doesn't matter, it is actually becoming matters arising, you have to work on your attitude. If a people frown at it even if you don’t care about them because you might care about is actually watching.
3. PRIDE: We are discussing pitfalls on single ladies, you see, pride is a canker worm that has eaten deep into the female system that it has become a bone in the throats of men that has been caught in the web that others are now very much afraid of it.
“Ladies with pride in them, get bossy and hate being submissive, listen to me, no sane man wants to share his authority with such person especially in his home’’.
Pride is very obvious among career ladies. Please quote me wrong, I love determined girls but I hate it when it gets to their head, affects their head of reasoning, debase their reputation and push them face on the ground. That is what pride does. Pride saves you from saying, I’m sorry, please forgive me, thanks; these words, short as it is, are very magical; they can do and undo things beyond comprehension. Ladies with pride in them, get bossy and hate being submissive, listen to me, no sane man wants to share his authority with such person especially in his home. Every normal being must have a little pride that makes her develop right self esteem, it makes you who you want to be, loss of it leads to low-self esteem, too much of it leads to high self-esteem which eventually become pride which leads to a fall i.e. a fall in that relationship, or even marriage.
4. INSATIABILITY: If I say fear, it has made many ladies unfaithful, it seem as if I’m giving an excuse for the act, if I say their self-esteem, I might be partially right, but I would rather say, it is sheer insatiability. Not being satisfied with what is offered by a single guy has made many ladies quest for more, the search for what might actually be formed as pleasure has made it difficult for ladies to settle down with one man. This desire has so blinded them that they fail to notice that the serious guys are no more and only the guys who are also looking for quest are left.
When reality eventually dawns on them, a lot of water must have passed under the bridge, there they are now seem to be hunting them and they are ready to be anybody’s girl but the problem is, nobody is actually willing to be hers. Wise dealings, extravagances, double-dating etc.
5. WISDOM: Wisdom is the principal thing, therefore get wisdom and in all your getting, get understanding, take firm hold of instruction, these are the precepts you need to get going in life.
Marriage unlike every other institution is a lifetime commitment and it demands wisdom to dealing with every curtain that is opened in your marital life.
Marriage is not a bed of roses, so it is also not a bed of thorns. It is what you make of it, ladies fail to face reality, and they refuse to accept that marriage is something for keep, something which foundation must be laid during courtship. Wisdom as rare as it is spoken, helps you determine between wrong and right, it tells
you that there is need for you to uphold some few vital virtues such as:
(a.) TRUST: This ordinary word, forms a basic tool on which every foundation must also be built, love brings things together trust uses those things to lay a foundation. No matter how the love is, if a lady is not trust worthy because of lifestyle or whatever reason, settling down becomes very difficult. When you are able to make your spouse trust you, he is convinced that you have his interest at heart, and he is able to tell you the truth.
(b) RESPECT: You can’t love who you don’t respect, you cannot gain respect from who doesn’t love you either. No matter how strong or beautiful a relationship is, the moment the lady starts disrespecting either herself or her spouse, she is in directly demolishing her building. Love also works with humility. Take it or not, love deserves respect; you can build love through an honest act of respect even from anything to do with a lady who will not help him uphold his ego, with himself, friends and family. Respect withhold is love withdrawn.
6. MODE OF COMMUNICATION: Mode of communication can not be over-emphasized in any relationship. It is indeed the life wire of any relationship. It helps build intimacy and avoid unnecessary understanding. A well expressed ideal is like a gift offered on a platter of gold; it is readily accepted. We ladies should be mindful of the way we communicate with our spouse to the wrong use of words can tear a person to pieces faster than a lethal weapon. The word is like an egg, when broken it is impossible to put back again. Our mode of communication may be in such a way that it distance people from us, if it becomes a habit, it also does so to our relationship.
It is expedient to allow communication to flow freely in your relationship, avoid flaring up or sulking when your opinion is not heard.
‘’Marriage is not a bed of roses, so it is also not a bed of thorns. It is what you make of it’’
Be mindful of this, you are always communicating something to that guy, it could be verbally or non-verbally even without our knowledge, communication involves what you mean to say, what you are actually saying and what the other person hears. Leaving an issue pending makes growth in a relationship difficult. Give time, make yourself available for him, and listen to his successes, failures, issues that concern him and he will not have to look elsewhere for a listening ear, when there is a communication hitch, the relationship suffers and this might lead to its death.
Communication aids understanding, it quickens forgiveness, it stops unnecessary conflicts, it nourishes and strengthens love. The truth is this, when there is no communication, there is no understanding, when there is no understanding, there is no intimacy, when there is no intimacy, there is no relationship and there is nothing like love.
There are various/countless reasons why ladies are finding it hard to settle down but with wisdom and foresight, you should be able to strategically position yourself at the right place, right time, for the right person doing the right things.
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